


Life hit's hard

by Tuesdays_Sun



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-08
Updated: 2018-09-07
Packaged: 2019-07-08 09:24:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15927530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tuesdays_Sun/pseuds/Tuesdays_Sun
Summary: Sam and Dean are out on a case talking to the nearly married reader. After a very traumatic night, the reader ends up alone and unsure of her life. Will hunting with the boys give her the direction she needs? Eventual Sam/reader form a relationship but it is a slow burn.





	Life hit's hard

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter features suicide of an oc but may be very triggering, read at your own risk.

You had just finished dyeing your dress the soft (Y/F/C) on the bottom in an ombre when Caleb came in.   
“(Y/N), I’m home,” he called out to you as you ran to the door. He had a bit of ketchup on his face and you wiped it off with your thumb before laying a kiss to his lips.  
“Babe, if you keep stopping for snacks after work you won’t fit into your tux by the wedding,” you joke with him as you grab his jacket. The wedding was coming in only a month and you had worked your butt off doing everything you possibly could yourself to make the wedding affordable. In order to keep family satisfied, you also had to be driving the 20 hours back to Colorado, from Georgia where you and Caleb had just moved.  
“I was just hungry. What’s for dinner tonight?” he asks you licking his lips.  
His hunger had gotten a little out of control as the big day came closer. Caleb had always had a big appetite, but since you too had moved to Georgia together for financial reasons it had grown exponentially. He had also been a bit angrier than before and you really couldn't explain it any other way than the stress of moving, the wedding, and his police training. You knew he was still the amazing man you fell in love with, just more on edge than usual.   
“I found my Nana’s old pasta maker so I'm going to do some ravioli, but I did get caught up with my dress so I'll start right now.” you smiled at him as he let out a heavy breath of annoyance. You headed towards the kitchen and started mixing some ingredients to turn to pasta.   
As you worked you saw him occasionally walk by the kitchen checking the progress. Two full hours later you had dinner finished, and plated as you called out to him. You had made enough for four people hopeful that three servings for him would be enough to keep him sated. The two of you ate quickly and you were grateful you had found the ravioli stuffing recipe and made a mental note to save the link to your Pinterest board. You were loving your new job as a dog walker as it gave you the income you needed, but the time to manage your new homemaker job, and hopefully motherhood soon into the marriage. Caleb was becoming a police officer a long time dream of his.   
Only three hours later just before you went to bed you saw him in the kitchen eating straight out of an almost empty tub of ice cream you swore you only bought two days ago.

A month later, you woke up to an already empty bed and quickly got ready. You were tying up your sneakers about to head out for your first walk of the day when you heard a knock on your door. Confused, not having any friends in the area yet, you opened the door to two slightly older than you, attractive men, in sharp suits.  
“Is this the residence of Caleb Haddon?” the shorter of the two men asked you.  
“Uhh, yeah but he is at work right now. He’ll be home at 5:30 tonight if you…” you were cut off.  
“We’d actually prefer to talk to you about him, (Y/n),” The shorter one interrupted you earning him a glare from the other man.   
“Uhh sure is this for his new position?” you asked confused as you invited the men in with a gesture of your hand. As you sit down in your front room with the men the man with the darker hair begins to speak.  
“No, ma’am, actually my name is Sam Page and this is my partner Dean Bonham, we are FBI agents. We wanted to speak to you about any changes you’ve seen from Caleb. You have to know who his father is, and we are wanting to make sure history doesn't repeat itself.” He looks into your eyes and notices your look of disbelief.   
“Gentlemen, I don’t know who you think you are kidding. Both of your last names just so happen to match Led Zeppelin band members, and FBI agents are really discouraged from having long hair like yours,” you say referring to Sam. “Are you Ron Hadden groupies or something, because Caleb is nothing like him and I’m sure he wouldn't be pleased having you in his home.” You say slightly reaching for your ankle knife, just in case.   
The men look at each other both looking impressed and annoyed.  
“Sharp girl,” Dean says to you. “Fine we are actually monster hunters, Ron was more than just a criminal (Y/N). He was a monster, not just a really bad guy monster, there are things not of this world you wouldn’t understand.” he talks down to you now.   
“Try me, I've seen evil many people never have. How many people you know would be engaged to the son of a famous cannibal?” You challenge the men with your eyes. The taller man looks at you seriously wishing he had given any effort into researching you before deciding to speak with you.   
“His father was actually a Rugaru, I’m sure you don’t need me to explain what that is in the age of the internet, but it's genetic. It stays dormant until around the mid-twenties and we want to see if maybe he has the gene. Have you noticed an increased appetite, or maybe an increase in aggression?” His face changes slowly to a comforting one and you try to determine if he is trying to manipulate you or not.  
You explain to the men about the upcoming stressors and tell them that Caleb is the kindest person you'd ever met, inviting them back for dinner in the evening to speak with him directly. “However guys, I'm now late for my jobs so I'm going to have to go.” You say gesturing for them to follow you out if the house. Before they leave they slip you Sams phone number in case you needed them or had any questions. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you got home you hopped in the shower and while only dressed in a towel you sat at your laptop and began doing your research on rugaru’s and actually letting yourself look into Caleb's father's history. You knew why he didn't want to talk about it with you, his father had killed and eaten his mom, followed by many others, and after his prison escape, he was supposedly killed in a car crash that set the car on fire. Knowing what you did from the “hunters” you met today your mind wondered if the car accident was really someone like them. You stood up and walked upstairs. You typed Sam’s number into your phone while you dressed.   
“Hey Sam, I just did some research. I wanted to know what our options are, what I read made it sound like it only gets worse from here.” as the words leave you, you hear a loud crashing sound.  
“(Y/N)!” Caleb shouts from downstairs, you feel scared. Caleb shouldn't be home right now and you had never heard so much anger in his voice before. “What the FUCK are you looking up my DAD FOR!?” he screams as he runs up the stairs.  
“Fuck, we may have a situation, keep quiet I’ll put you on speaker but just in case…” you stop talking and set your phone down just in time for Caleb to grab you by the throat and push you up against the wall.

Sam mutes his phone and desperately calls for Dean, as he runs for the motel door and grabs the Impala keys, Dean on his heels Sam tosses him the keys and they drive quickly to your and Caleb's house still listening through the phone as he screams at you.   
“I’m not like my dad! I am not my dad! Why the fuck are you looking him up NOW!” You continuously try to calm him down reminding him that you love him, and Sam is scared of what may happen to you if they can't get there in time. He hears you fighting Caleb physically while you speak to him with so much love, Sam knows Caleb has actually hit you at least a couple times but you don’t stop trying to reason with him.   
“Why are you doing this you aren't a monster, Caleb look in the mirror!” The boys hearing you yelling and they are impressed with you for letting them know that he hasn't eaten human yet, at least not by what you can tell. He can still overcome this, whether or not either you nor Caleb yet know.   
As the boys pull up to the house they see the front door is left open and hear the yelling continue. Running after the voices they hear, passing a smashed laptop they see Caleb holding you down with incredible strength. Dean pulls Caleb off you and immediately struggles with him but gets Caleb’s arms locked behind him. Sam comforts you as you lay sobbing.   
“Who are you? That's my fiance! DON'T TOUCH HER!” Caleb continues screaming at the boys before Dean hits him across the head with a lamp, it temporarily knocks him out. Eyes red you don’t even know what to say, the men don't speak but they quickly work to tie Caleb to the chair in the room with some electrical cord.   
“Are you okay?”Sam finally asks you after checking all Caleb's limbs. They can talk to him when he wakes up but now they have time.  
“I swear he has never tried to hurt me before, Sam, but he hasn't changed, he hasn’t eaten human flesh, he looks normal…” you panic in your words and Sam looks at you with genuine compassion.  
“The last Rugaru we had gone nasty before he went dark side,” Dean says to you before looking at his brother. “I don’t know he will be able to pull this off like we thought.” You stare at your fiance before walking out of the room.  
“(Y/N), where are you going? We want to talk to you about…” Sam turns the corner seeing you sitting against the wall   
“I can’t look at him right now, he isn't himself,” you say as he sits next to you on the floor.   
“Dean, will you go grab some hamburger or something for when he wakes up, so we can show him?” now addressing you, as his brother starts leaving the house, “if he can eat enough animal meat it may stave off his hunger for human flesh, but my brother and I have never actually seen it work. I think Dean and I are both worried that the change in him already is going to make it really hard for Caleb, and you.”   
The two of you speak for around 20 minutes about the situation.  
“I mean you guys aren't married yet, you have options, his is basically keeping very a careful non-human meatatarian, or the less than desirable alternative,” Sam tells you seriously, but as he finishes speaking you hear what sounds like glass shattering and he shoots up to re-enters the bedroom seeing a shattered window and no Caleb.   
“Where did he go?” You ask frantically. Looking out the window he’s peeling out in the car, you just turn and look at Sam.  
If he was working on getting out of his restraints, how much of the conversation with Sam had he heard? Sam called his brother and you heard the irritation in Dean’s voice. You knew if you could get to Caleb and talk to him you could explain everything, but with no car and no clue where to go, you felt helpless. Sam argued with Dean for a minute on the phone but he concluded the call, “Fine, I’ll keep her here, just hurry up and find him.”  
“No, No, No, NO I am not just staying here waiting! Sam if I need too, I will run after that car!” you yell at him frustration growing as you feel the situation get more and more out of your control.   
“(Y/N), I don’t like it either but it’s my job to make sure nobody gets hurt!” he is raising his voice not to scare you, but because he too is frustrated by the situation. He knows Dean is right that Caleb would more likely than not hurt her, and that waiting at the house is a good place to be if he comes back but he had a bad feeling about it. He likes (Y/N) thinks she is smart, and compassionate, and beautiful even if she is taken. He knows whatever it was that happened in your past made you strong, he thinks you could be vital to keeping Caleb human.   
Your mind races with what if’s; What if Caleb hurts someone? What if Caleb eats human? What if Dean finds him while he’s alone and kills him before he gets the chance to try before he even knows the truth?  
“Sam, I have to try I will never forgive myself if something happens.” you look up at him through red eyes feeling very small and broken. This was the path you had chosen for yourself you thought you got away from the bullshit but it was like evil was magnetized to you.   
“What do you think Caleb would feel like if he killed you?” He said it very matter of factly and you stopped fighting Sam, and started learning what you could about his brother.  
“Will Dean shoot him? If he sees Caleb is it all over?” you needed to hear it. You needed Caleb to console you, to be himself again. But if nothing else you needed to see him again.   
“Not if he’s human (Y/N), use your belief in Caleb right now. You know as well as I do he heard us and I can't imagine he is happy knowing what he is. He probably needs a minute to let the news all sink in."

By nightfall, you felt like you had cried your body dry, and yet you haven't heard a word from Dean or Caleb. “Sam, will you call Dean, please?” you ask him seriously and he nods at you before reaching out for his phone and standing to walk into another room in case the time looking for him has prepped Dean to say something you wouldn't appreciate hearing. Dean answered on the second ring and immediately started with...  
“Sammy, you are not going to like what I am about to say.” Dean warned but continued, “Caleb killed himself… he left a note for (Y/N), he found out about everything and shot himself before he turned.” Sam had no idea how to react, or how to tell you. Only, he didn't need too as he quickly turned and realized you stood frozen behind him. He bent down to touch you as you broke down into a panic attack.  
“Not again, please god” you cry out loudly and start mumbling nonsensically. Sam feels out of his element but after losing Jess he knows the grief you are going through to some element. He picked you up and held you as he walked you to the couch. You felt completely dissociated and couldn’t make sense of your thoughts. On repeat, you just thought suicide, dead, Caleb, gone, pain. Sam held you as you violently sobbed for over an hour, Dean had told the police he just found Caleb after Caleb took off before dinner. He kept the note to give you before the police pinned him as a man gone insane, and explained he knew you and Caleb before you had moved to the state, and had gone looking for him per your request.   
The police spoke to you after you calmed down a little, and you made a quick lie about the fight you had with Caleb. The second they left Dean handed the letter to you. You silently thanked him before reading over the final words Caleb had wanted you to hear from him.

(Y/n),   
You were always too good for me. Even before I knew I was just waiting to become a monster like my father. I am sorry that I ever tried having a normal life, I should have known. I hope that this doesn't ruin your chance at a normal life. I am so sorry if I hurt you today I didn’t understand what this was. I wish I had a better way but I couldn’t become my father. Away from all the evils of this world, I will wait for you in heaven. Please live a happy life, and don’t blame yourself for any of this.

The rest of the letter was filled with permissions to take the money, car, and house as you'd bought it together. So few words on a page concluded what you thought that morning was the rest of your life.   
“Thank you for being here for me.” you are still crying but at this point, it's just a waterfall that won't stop, your speech had returned to you and he hugged you again.   
“I am not going anywhere you need someone tonight, let's just sit and you can talk to me until I know you're okay.” You nod but walk to the kitchen to pull out a hidden bottle of whiskey and start drinking from it straight. After about a quarter of the bottle was gone Sam pulled it away from you and looked impressed and afraid of you. Dean quickly pulled it from his hands and told you his brother was a bad drinking partner and he took a swig before handing it back to you. 

After a little more drinking and Sam convincing you to drink some beer instead you started opening up to the boys. “My mom, she killed herself when I was nine. My evil stepmother was a witch,” you chuckle to yourself, “she told me about the history of the house before we sold it, but she never actually did anything about the presence. I have always wondered about that. Maybe I will take over this whole hunting thing. I don’t have great luck with normal life.”  
“Maybe we could join you on that, bold first hunt.” he smiles at you feeling his heartbreak for another victim of the hunting life but feeling drawn to you at the same time. Dean gives Sam a look but it goes missed as Sam stands up and holds your hand pulling you up. “Maybe it is time for bed, unfortunately, tomorrow is going to be a lot.” he gives you privacy to change into pajamas and hugs you. “Call me tomorrow, I can help you out with all this, my girlfriend died a few years back I can help you navigate the technical crap.”  
As you drift off you imagine the realities of your life now. You liked the brothers and Sam seemed like he really cared for you, but you had genuinely no idea what you would be doing a month from now.


End file.
